Joe woke up one morning and looked for his wife, but his wife
wasn't there. She had awakened and was preparing breakfast in the
kitchen. Joe was afraid he might spoil the moment by getting up, so he
called his little boy and sent this note to his wife...

THE TENT POLE IS UP,
THE CANVAS IS SPREAD,
TO HELL WITH BREAKFAST,
COME BACK TO BED.

The wife answered the note and sent it back by the boy. It read...

TAKE THE TENT POLE DOWN,
PUT THE CANVAS AWAY,
THE MONKEY IS BLEEDING,
NO CIRCUS TODAY.

So he sent another note down. It read...

THE TENT POLE'S STILL UP,
AND THE CANVAS STILL SPREAD,
SO DROP WHAT YOU'RE DOING,
AND COME GIVE ME SOME HEAD.

To which she replied...

I'M SURE THAT YOUR POLE'S,
THE BEST IN THE LAND,
BUT I'M BUSY RIGHT NOW,
SO DO IT BY HAND!

------------------------------------------------------------

Superman was flying around thinking, "I need a shag". The Man of
Steel was gagging for it. He passed over Gotham City when he saw Batman,
so he flew down for some advice. "Hey Bats, who's a good shag?"

Batman replied, "Well Supe, everyone knows that Wonder Woman is
the best sex in comic-land, why don't you try her?"

"I'd love to, but Wonder Woman and I are friends, so I don't
really want to take advantage of her"

"Damn shame," said Batman, and waved goodbye to Superman as he
flew off.

Ten minutes later he was flying low over a city when he saw
Spiderman swinging from rooftop to rooftop. He flew down. "Hey Spidey, I'm
cruisin'  for a piece of arse, who's the best shag in comic-land?"

"Hey, Big S, everyone knows that Wonder Woman is far and away
the best shag in comic-land, why don't you try her?"

"Well we are sort of friends," he said, "but I didn't realise
she had gotten around so much" and he flew off in frustration.

Twenty minutes later he was flying over a field when he saw
Wonder Woman lying naked, in the middle of the field, with her legs apart
and up in the air.

Superman was tempted. "Goddamn it!" he thought to himself, "I'm
faster than a  speeding bullet, I can be in and out of there before she
even knows I'm here."

So with a blur and a sonic boom he was down, in and gone.

Wonder Woman stared up into the sky with a glazed expression.
"What the fuck was that?" she exclaimed.

"I don't know," said the Invisible Man as he rolled off, "But my
arse is killing me."